Still at it...

Still trying to get settled in to new place...got a few things that I still need to gather from the old house...we're getting there...I am so tired...feeling expendable...trying to get Laurance set up for tutoring, and getting settled in at the same time...it's too overwhelming...just feel like crawling into a hole, curling up going to sleep, and not waking up...lots of emotional diarrhea, not enough tissue...boy what visual that is...LOL!

Feeling expendable...shut down...shut down...shut down...

It's a good life if you let it be...
Hold to the good memories...
Discard the bad...

My mind goes back everyday...
Thinking, remembering, and a smile clears my face...
My heart is warmed by memories of love.

You do not have to believe in God to have a connection to a higher consciousness; just open and clear your mind, and you will see what is already there; has always been there. You don't have to call it God, you don't have to call it anything, just be; because IT is you, and you are IT.

Life and death should be equal and free...

Not one preserved and one feared,

But both respected and revered....

~~~Me

Moving is so frustrating...but we're almost completely out of the old place and into our new one...just a little more to go.

There is so much confusion in this world that we have created.  We are taught from a very young age, not to speak, but to listen to the voice of authority; to do as we are told.  Parents become angry when their children voice their own opinion, they tell them not to talk back.  The time that we are allotted for a lifetime on this plane, passes so quickly; one day we wake up and we realize that we're half way through our lives, and most of that time was spent working and trying to get things done in a material world that cannot be satisfied.

If there's something that I have learned about personal happiness it's that it should never depend on the approval or affection of another; that is what feeds the emotional and sexual addiction. If we are of the personality type that depends on another person for our personal happiness, then where is our personal identity? It's wrapped up in the other; therefore, you know not yourself, so how can you know another? If I can turn to me and say that I love myself as deeply as I would any other human being, then I have freed myself, and I have alleviated that other person of a huge responsibility, that of my personal happiness; now they can take care of their own happiness. Do you see what I mean?

I believe that the people we meet come into our lives for a reason. I also believe we have a choice in who we fall for; although, in some cases that may not seem true, but I believe we always have a choice, it just comes down to a yes or no. Even so, when powerful emotions are involved that choice may not seem so obvious, but we always have a choice.

As of today I have lost 26lbs...and I am surprised to say that it was pretty easy.

I am not sorry for having loved a man, just sorry that he may think I hate him for not loving me back.